A Licensed Child Placing Agency & Home Study Provider

The Adoption & Family Support Center, LLC, 709 Hills Blvd., Port Orange, Florida  32127

Toll Free: 866-221-6562 Main Number: 386-760-5804

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ADOPTION SUCCESS STORIES

In addition to our Success Stories, click here to view our gallery of "completed families"

                                   A Tale of Two Little Boys

In 1998 and again in 2000 two little boys came into my life. From the minute each was born they had my heart and soul. These two little people are my grandsons, of whom I had legal custody and total care from the time they were born. My role was Mom, my title Grandma. And a single one at that.

As time went on it became apparent that I had to think of their futures. Who would take care of them if something happened to me? Having a grandma who loved them dearly, fought for them fiercely, tried to provide for them as well as I was able, who worked full time, long hours during a hefty portion of the year was not enough. They deserved more. They needed more.  Sometimes love really is not enough.

I reached a soul tearing, heart breaking decision that these two little boys needed a forever Mom and Dad…a forever family. Fate, or whatever one wishes to call it, led me to the Family Support Center.  What I found there was compassion, understanding, care and most importantly a family for “my” boys.

The boys were ready before I was!  The feeling of guilt (I should have been able to raise them), the questions in my head (Did I do the right thing? Will they ever understand? Do they know I truly love them and did not want to “give them up or away”?) remain. With one exception… it was most definitely the right thing to do!

Today – six years later – these two little people are thriving and happy.  They have the love, support and care of a Mom and Dad as well as a large extended family. A forever family. They have more family normalcy than a single Grandma could give them. This is what the miracle of adoption has provided for them.

And I have peace of mind, knowing that they have this wonderful family and they are fine, more than fine. Their happiness and security far outweighs any sadness and pain I felt at letting them go. Because they were and are the only priority. And as a bonus, for which I will be forever grateful, I have also been blessed to have a relationship with the boys’ wonderful Mom and Dad and family. 

They have accepted me and some of my family into theirs.  So, I am still Grandma!

All I have to do is talk to the boys, see the boys and I know this was without any doubt the right and best thing to do for them.

I have been told by several of the boys’ new and forever family that this decision was unselfish, loving and not only a gift to the boys but a gift to their Mom and Dad and families.

Anyone considering adoption for his/her child must know that what is best for that child must be first and foremost the consideration and that whether or not the adoption is open the greatest love you can give that child is their future, a happy secure future. The best gift of all!

                                                     

A loving Grandma

This special Grandmother's story continues....

The kids are in tucked in bed, I am doing the last load of laundry of their clothes and gathering up items to pack for them.  Their clothes for tomorrow are ready to jump into in the morning. This is a special night…. Because……

Early in the morning their forever Mom and Dad are coming to pick them up and take them home. Yes, HOME! A long, roughly 6-year turmoil filled journey is finally ending where it should. These two (brother and sister) will begin a new life.

It is especially poignant for me because I am their Grandma.  But, I will hand them over to their new parents with joy – for these children. These are two of four grandchildren who have been adopted. The older two in 2002 – those two were with me from birth to ages 2 and 4 and never in the “ system”. These two have been in the system and in and out of foster care and reunifications since birth. Although I have been in their lives and fighting for their future all along, only in the last few weeks have they been with me.

The parents in both cases have given me the gift of remaining in the lives of the children.

And it is indeed a gift, one that is not always given.  In each case the parents owe me nothing, nothing at all. Yet, in each case they have chosen to allow me to remain Grandma. I choose to embrace that gift and not have expectations, not abuse it, not interfere (kind of like the stereotypical mother-in-law does).

Letting go is difficult and painful, until you realize that the focus is the children – not you!  So, grandparents who have had to let go yet remain in their grandchildren’s’ lives…embrace the fact that you do remain in their lives, celebrate their forever family and give Mom and Dad and children their space. Relish the time you spend with them and have no expectations.

And so, tomorrow morning, I will give them hugs, give Mom and Dad hugs and a new chapter starts. Remember, it is a true gift for which we should be grateful, that the forever parents have chosen to keep us in the lives of their children.

A loving Grandma

"Adopt" a new outlook on life....